I'm loving these Mood Mondays posts! I started blogging as a way to chat about beauty products, but these posts are such a great way to share a different side of me too. This week, it's helping me vent a little. Key word...vent!! I've never had a rant session on my blog before, and I don't plan to again. I actually really debated on whether or not to blog about this situation, but I decided...this is what's going on in my life, and I'm going to just let it out and then move on! If you don't want to read my little rant, that's perfectly ok! This is a mini therapy session for me :)
I'm a big believer in the saying that goes, "you're judged by the company you keep." My mom used to tell me that, but the Spanish version is something like, "tell me who you know, and I'll tell you who you are." It all boils down to the same basic idea...surround yourself with people who have qualities you value, and would be proud of. As I get older, I'm more and more careful of who I let into "the circle." Especially being married, I feel like the people closest to me can only be people who respect my relationship, my values, and my home. At my last job, I became friends with a girl who appeared to be someone like that at first. The more time went on, the more it became evident that she was the opposite. She became very rude, making fun of everything I did - from the nail polish I chose, to what I ate, to more personal/moral beliefs. Everything I mentioned that I liked, she scoffed at. It was like she was trying to tear me down in an effort to make me possibly want to get her approval...? I don't even know. She's actually the reason I never talk about my blog or my YouTube on my Instagram...I just didn't want to hear her negative comments regarding something I love doing so much. Every time I talked to her, she was fighting with someone - friends, coworkers, relatives, the person at the McDonald's drive thru...no one was safe. Going out in public with her became increasingly more embarrassing due to the way she treated complete strangers. I found myself leaving extra-large tips for servers when we would go out to restaurants, because I felt bad for what they had to deal with.
After one particular comment she made regarding my relationship, I decided this was not a friendship I wanted to be a part of anymore. I began trying to distance myself. However, the more I pushed away, the more ... what's the word ... psychotic she became. Calling and texting at all hours. Calling several times in a row if I didn't answer my phone (even though it's common knowledge I don't answer my phone at work or after 10 p.m. - awake or no - texting numerous times in a row, paragraphs at a time. One friend of mine even compared her to a crazy controlling boyfriend! So I finally decided...instead of just attempting to distance myself, it was time to be straightforward and put it all out there. I don't need to invite that kind of attitude into my inner circle. Someone who is going to belittle the most important relationship I have has no right to be called a friend. Now that I've made the decision to cut ties with this person, I feel pure gratitude towards my mother, for instilling that saying in my little brain.
It's always difficult to come to the decision to let someone go from your life. But you have to stop and think...
- Is this person looking out for my best interest?
- Is this someone I'm comfortable hanging out with?
- Is this someone that respects me, my decisions, and my beliefs?
Of course it's not logical to think that someone is going to like everything you like, and dislike everything you dislike. But there's a difference between stating an opinion and belittling others for not being exactly like you. Hopefully, none of you have to deal with making a similar decision. But just know that even though there are people out there who are not truly there for you...there are plenty of others who will stick by you and truly be supportive. Thanks for bearing with me through my rant :)